Wednesday, September 03, 2003

Geek Quotes

Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
When all else fails, read the instructions.

Every task takes twice as long as you think it will take. If you
double the time you think it will take, it will actually take four
times as long.

There is always one item on the screen menu that is mislabeled and

Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them.

Blessed is the end user who expects nothing, for he/she will not be

At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you
will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming
it on the computer.

Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.

Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to
detectable errors, which by definition are limited.

Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the
probable cost of errors, or until someone insists on getting
some useful work done.

The first myth of management is that it exists.

Any given program, when running, is obsolete.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
Any given program will expand to fill all available memory.
The value of a program is proportional to the weight of its
Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capability of the
programmer who must maintain it.

Inside every large program is a small program struggling to get out.

There's never time to do it right, but always time to do it over.

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one
that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.

The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the
time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.

The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone
he can blame it on.

An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.

Judgement comes from experience; experience comes from poor judgement.

Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to
use it.

Given any problem containing N equations, there will be N+1

An object or bit of information most needed will be least

Any device requiring service or adjustment will be least

In any human endeavor, once you have exhausted all possibilities
and fail, there will be one solution, simple and obvious, highly visible
to everyone else.

Badness comes in waves.

After designing a useful routine that gets around a familiar "bug"
in the system, the system is revised, the "bug" is taken away, and
you're left with a useless routine.

Efforts in improving a program's "user friendliness" invariably
lead to work in improving user's "computer literacy."

That's not a "bug," that's a feature!

An expert is a person who avoids the small errors while sweeping on
to the grand fallacy.

"You can use an eraser on the drafting table or a sledgehammer on the construction site." Frank Lloyd Wright


Blogger McKay said...

A few other useful ones for your enjoyment:

"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs,
maybe you just don't understand the situation."

Hawkin's Theory of Progress:
Progress does not consist of replacing a theory that is wrong with one that is right. It consists of replacing a theory that is wrong with one that is more subtly wrong.

MacDonald's Second Law:
Consultants are mystical people who ask a company for a number and give it back to them.

Woltman's Law:
Never program and drink beer at the same time.

Ralph's Observation:
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.

"To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer."

Ginsberg's Restatement of the Three Laws of Thermodynamics:
You can't win.
You can't break even.
You can't quit.

Weinberg's Second Law:
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, the first woodpecker to come along would destroy civilization.


3:32 PM  
Blogger mgibs17 said...

Well, it’s amazing. The miracle has been done. Hat’s off. Well done, as we know that “hard work always pays off”, after a long struggle with sincere effort it’s done.
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4:02 PM  

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